Wednesday, 15 August 2012
-

So I bought a new bikini yesterday to wear this weekend. It's really cute but I feel way to fat to wear it. I need way more definition in my abs. My love handles have a muffin. My inner thighs are so blubbery.
Be honest- would I be a disgusting spectacle if I went out in public like this? I am going to work my ass off until Saturday to improve as much as possible, but still.
I downloaded some AWESOME apps on my phone yesterday- one is called plastic surgery simulator. Plastic surgery scares me, and I'd probably never do it, but I fantasize sometimes. And just like real life... when I played with it I kept making more and more adjustments until the whole picture looked like watercolors. And THAT is why I'll never do it, lol. I also got a weight loss simulator where you can take pounds off. I think I will look good at my goal which is about 20-25lbs.
Anyway, E2 was too sick to see me last night =[ but we are both really excited for Saturday. It'll be awesome =] aaahhhhh I can't wait!! It'll be the first time we get to be alone together except the car ride back the other night. My stomach is doing flips just thinking about it. I feel so super weird... Like one of those girls who moves too fast and scares guys away. In my head I tell him I love him, lol. It's silly cause there's no way I could possibly yet, but I just want to burst. I'm never like this... then again he talks about having my kids over his house and wants to know about my family life and all... he definately isn't in one night stand mode. Ok, got to stop overanalyzing this NOW.
Oh and that black british guy T is still all over my business. He is also VERY hot, and pretty rich, but idk he just doesn't do it for me like E2. He keeps asking to hang out, texts me all the time and comments my facebook constantly. I wonder if E2 has a facebook...
Post a Comment
- Back to oneLBcloser's Xanga Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in oneLBcloser's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)



Comments (17)
Happy to Hear that your happy with E2, As for the weight goal, you'll get there !
Stay strong and dont give up hope hunn !!!I think it looks cute! if your bottom half concerns you maybe wear a sarong or something like that. ive been doing something and its killing my love handles. you stand with your feel hip width apart, put your hands on your hips and like crunch straight down bringing your elbow straight down towards your hips. its super easy and i feel hella dumb doing it but OMG! my love handles hurt SO bad! i did like 100 before bed because I WANT THEM GONE! good luck! your gunna do great!
@MagentaGlowWorm - The only things that bother me are my stomach and my inner thighs. The "mommy zone" lol. My legs are fine except for right there, so I'd feel silly with a sarong. He's seen me in a mini skirt. I guess I just have to suck it up and let it all hang out, lol. Alcohol should help. But I still have 4 days to slim down as much as possible. The exercise you're describing, are you moving from side to side? Like when you're pregnant and trying to stretch your butt muscle??
you can def wear a bikini, and im not saying that to make u feel better i would never let you go out in public looking fat, have some drinks, wear the bikini, and you will be just fine! Maybe if u fast the day you will look even thinner good luck! oh p.s u should totally look up E2 on facebook, what else is it for then to stalk and analyze men! :)
@perfectionis135 - I really value your opinion and you have convinced me! I hope you would tell me if I shouldn't lol. I took this pic after not running for 5 days because I was recovering from being sick, so after 4 runs I should look tighter. Taking this break from running I have been restricting so well... I know that running makes me hungry. Got to keep it in check because the less I eat the better I'll look too. AND have to drink water, lots of it. Thanks so much love
@sonnigenmai - LOL thanks! And I think the thing I do right is not have sex with them. T is definately a man-whore. And one that's not used to hearing "no". So he's trying super hard haha.
I hate my mummy zone too ><
Have fun ;)
@NEthing4slim - Thank you! Haha yes I have rediculous boobs... the bathing suit is a medium bottom and XL top hahahaha.
I hope you can relax and enjoy yourself.
Nice that you a good boyfriend.
@ANVRSADDAY - Thanks so much! I agree, some bikinis are very attention seeking and impractical... If you sneeze you can go from PG-13 to R, how are you supposed to swim???
My daughter is not allowed to wear a bikini... but she is only 4 =P
I think you look great! I just thought of a funny story.... I only wear bikinis, so my fat a$$ is flauntin around for the world to see and this one day, I had a top mishap, and does my husband warn me? No! He's snappin pics while I give everyone a free show!
I really need to get back to the Tony Horton (Power 90) tapes.....
@Kellsbella - HAH! He was just proud of you, Dear =]
@oneLBcloser - I must say that I prefer your body to your avatar's.
@Kellsbella - If I could give it to you, I would.
I know how it feels having a bad view of something even though everyone says you look fine.
I personally think you look great but you be the judge. Only do it if you're comfortable because that's what matters the most.
And I'm kind of going through the same thing with a girl. It's driving me nuts and I'm doing tons of over analyzing as well. I sent her 2 txt's and now I feel like a clingy idiot!
But anyway, keep it up. You can do it and you're already looking good :)
@aSelfdestroyer - Thanks a bunch =] I know that I'm not satisfied with my body and that's what matters... I just know that I may not be the best judge of whether or not I should go in public like this. I still see a size 18 when I look at myself =/
I think that texting has changed the dating process forever... You CAN talk 24/7, but should you? What's too much? Not enough? How many other people is she texting? Did that sound stupid? Wait, she suddenly stopped answering, is she dead, busy, not getting my texts? How long should I wait before I send another one? UGGGHHH it sucks!!
@oneLBcloser - Exactly. And I know from experience that some will just say you look fine cause they don't really care or are just trying to make you feel better. So you go out and then realize how horrible you look and feel and now you feel even worse about yourself. I don't want that happening to you. So take your time!
And I know right! I had to keep in the back of my mind that her phone was kinda on the fritz but I still didn't want to send too many. Then finally she replies like the next day. I'm thinking she must have thought what I said was lame. Or maybe she's passing her phone around and everyone is laughing!? I think voice mails are better. You can say the same thing and they can hear you're tone so they don't think you sound desperate or whatever. And just leave one VM and say everything in that. But I'm still not sure lol